The Beetle of the Skies?

A New York Times Great Getaways advertorial message that arrived in my inbox this morning reads: "Öntimenleiven means you'll be impressed by Lufthansa's punctuality. You'll also appreciate nohassleböarden, and the warm greetings you'll receive from Lufthansa personnel. Once on board, you can settle into your schnöozenseat to be pampered in comfort for your entire journey. It all adds up to eazenträvel for you to over 400 worldwide destinations."

It brought to mind the old Volkswagen ad campaign featuring a real German word, Fahrvergnügen -- meaning "driving pleasure." Then I thought of Häagen-Dazs ice cream, a premium brand that is part of the Dreyer's multi-brand ice cream empire, which I think is now produced under a joint venture company of Pillsbury and Nestle. In any case, before it became a cog in a multi-national corporate wheel, Häagen-Dazs was developed and named in the Bronx. Rueben Mattus, who founded the brand, thought that non-English combination of letters and random umlaut conveyed Continental quality and tradition.

Lufthansa's new ad -- whether only online or also in the print media -- uses pseudo-German words to convey the same message. Just as well that we can enjoy such ersatz (real German for "substitute" or even "phony") Continentalism here, because the dollar is continuing to fall against other currencies, and at $1.48 dollars to the euro (yesterday's close), many American travelers won't be able to afford the real thing.